If your time in the bedroom with your partner is starting to feel a little dull and boring, or you are just looking to increase the intimacy between in your relationship, it might be time for an overhaul. We have come up with a Naughty Bucket list of 21 items to add some spice to your relationship and help you reconnect with your partner.
What is a sex bucket list? Well, it is a list of raunchy, hot and fun experiences to add to your repertoire! These are sure to spice up your relationship in a safe way, and as you tick them off the list, they will become naughty little secrets between the two of you. What are you waiting for? Read on to reignite the spark and get some satisfaction with your favourite!
#1 Watch each other masturbate for visual stimulation
There are plenty of myths surrounding masturbation, such as doing it too often will cause parts to fall off, or you may have a shortage of orgasms in the future. The truth is, masturbation is not something to be ashamed of and is a natural part of body exploration. Many people in relationships can feel insecure about masturbating in front of their partner, but this is one spicy activity that can be mutually beneficial. Watching each other masturbate is visually pleasing and can help you to learn about each other’s bodies and pleasure points. Masturbating in front of your partner will push you to overcome any shyness, and this newfound confidence will filter to other areas of the bedroom. Plus, it can lead to masturbating each other!
#2 Add toys to make your naughty time even naughtier
When couples are looking to mix things up in the bedroom, sex toys are often one of the first things to be introduced. 45% of people use sex toys with their partner, as they really help to hit those pleasure packed spots. We suggest using them on yourself and each other while stimulating different areas at the same time. If you have ever visited a sex shop, you would have noticed the overwhelming variety on offer. Start with the traditional (yet never boring) vibrator with different intensities and speeds to learn about what works with your body. As your confidence grows, work your way up to butt plugs and dildos. Take care to keep them clean between use, by using a dedicated toy cleaner.
#3 Try anal, the right way!
Anal sex. It is one of those things people can’t get enough of, have had a bad experience with or are too scared to try. Why does it have such a bad reputation? Because, it is something which can be painful if done incorrectly. When done right, anal sex can create a whole range of new sensations, and intensely erotic anal orgasms are a real thing. This should definitely be on every couple’s sexy bucket list! To experience everything anal sex has to offer, use plenty of lube and always engage in foreplay. There is nothing worse than not being prepared, and you can start with fingers until you build up confidence. Choose a comfortable position and start slowly. Over time you may even enjoy trying new anal positions.
#4 Take control with domination
“Mr. Grey will see you now”. Domination is a common fantasy as there is something to be said for either taking control, or allowing your partner to control you. If you are interested in trying domination, you don’t have to go the whole way. There is no need to convert a room of your home into a dungeon (unless you want to of course), as you can begin by using handcuffs or by trying your partner to the bed. Dip your toe in the water and discuss your limits before deciding who would prefer to be dominated. You may love it, or hate it but this will be an experience you will never forget. This highly erotic sex act is best performed with someone you trust, and as things progress may even help to fulfill those BDSM role-playing fantasies. Black leather and whips are optional.
#5 Create sensual memories by getting dirty in the car
There is something naughty about doing it in the car, and the safest way to achieve this is in a stationary vehicle. Depending on the size of your car, this can be potentially awkward but that is where a sense of fun and adventure comes in. This is like having the voyeurism of doing it in public, but from the security of your vehicle. If you aren’t feeling flexible enough to go The Full Monty, try pulling over for a BJ. The idea of someone catching you will be a massive turn on. Every time you drive past the sexy spot, you and your partner will be reminded of the naughtiness you got up to. These sensual memories will be something you can reminisce about together.
#6 Fulfil your fantasies with role play
When you have been with someone for a while, your sexual confidence can take a dive. Dressing up and acting out those fantasies with role play can help you rekindle the spark and give you the opportunity to be someone else in the bedroom. Role-playing will push you out of your rut while building trust and intimacy. Fantasies come in all varieties, and it is likely you or your partner have something in mind already. If you are stuck for ideas, there are some go-to themes with costumes readily available at stores and online. Think dirty secretary, naughty nurse or sexy school girl, and drive your partner wild!
#7 Film yourselves (it will be better than any adult video)
A homemade video made Kim Kardashian famous, but the idea of your escapades being leaked may have made you afraid to get out the video camera. However, in a trusting adult relationship, capturing you and your partner doing it can be a new kind of adventure. It isn’t uncommon to feel self conscious during sex, and this is one way to get out of your comfort zone! It will feel as though you are being watched, and you can view your video together, over and over again…it will be better than any porn! You will see how hot you both look, and you may even decide to make a series with different camera angles and positions.
#8 Add household items to the bedroom
Food doesn’t have to be limited to the fridge, and a little creativity can go a long way in the exploration department. Food can create new erotic sensations and can be much more fun than plain old lube. Adding household items to the bedroom will encourage licking, touching and sucking, with sticky, hot or cold feelings all over your body. Ice cubes will give an intense burst of the chills while still being pleasurable. Whipped cream, honey or chocolate sauce will be pleasurable for both the giver and receiver. Tempted to experiment some more? If you are up for it a combination of pleasure and (mild) pain, dripping hot wax will give a truly unique sensation.
#9 Mix up the positions and try something new
One of our favourite naughty bucket list ideas for couples is actually not a unique suggestion and something you may have even considered already. It is pretty simple…don’t be afraid to try new things. Add new moves and positions, remembering their complexity will depend on how experimental you are. Get creative, because how far you go is only limited by your imagination. Some moves will work, some won’t, but the main thing is you will be in it together. Try the Reverse Cowgirl or Cradled Cowgirl where she lays on top in an embrace, or the Twisted Spoon as both lay on their sides, with the male behind. If you are strong and flexible you can try standing up. And, don’t forget the 69er, because everyone wins!!
#10 Get it on in public, without getting caught
There is a thrill of being risky and we could create a whole new article full of sexy bucket list places to try. Getting out and about will make you feel like a teenager, and to avoid getting told off, go for places that feel naughtier than they are. If you are shy and don’t want to get caught (public sex is illegal), try opening your windows at home or place a mirror in a strategic position. Try other rooms in your house and if you are ready to venture out, deserted beaches in summer are a romantic place to start. Then, there are hand jobs at the cinema, making love in bathrooms or on balconies, and of course…don’t forget to join the mile-high club!
# 11 Be a little rough, starting with doggy style
Being a little rough in a safe environment can be extremely raw and passionate, and this is one of our top sexy bucket list ideas. When pushing the boundaries, it has to be mutual so discuss your fantasies beforehand and don’t be afraid to say if you have had enough. Try going doggy style while grabbing each other’s hair or add some spanking to spice things up. When you have spontaneous, ravenous sex it can be a turn on and is the stuff future dirty dreams are made of. Rip those stockings and pull down those panties because rough sex should be on your list of sexy bedroom antics!
#12 Have a hotel sexathon, choose quantity over quality
We always think sex should be long, with drawn-out foreplay and intimacy…and most of the time it should be. But, when it comes to getting your groove back with your partner, sometimes a dirty weekend of room service and the attitude of “quantity over quality” is just what you both need. Book a hotel room for 24 hours and put a do not disturb sign on the door because this, my friend, will be like having an affair (but with each other). Try different moves and have sex over and over, and don’t bother getting dressed in between. Turn off the devices because this is about rediscovering each other with your very own sexathon. Satisfaction guaranteed.
#13 Pull out and make a mess
Messy sex can be the best sex, and it doesn’t always have to finish where it is supposed to. Encourage his cum to land on different parts of your body to add some cheeky fun to your regular nighttime routine. The man will find it extremely sexy as his partner watches him reach climax. Try swallowing (it’s not so bad), or she can kneel down and let him cum all over her face. Trust us, if he thinks she is turned on, he will be too. Don’t want to mess up the hair? Another option is on all fours as he finishes over her backside, or if he is a breast man he may prefer the chest area. Giving him the odd hand job can also increase your sexual chemistry.
#14 Tease them with a massage to build the sexual tension
A massage can be a sensual form of foreplay and really helps to set the mood for what is about to come. Drive them crazy as you touch them everywhere but their privates, just make sure your hands are warm and any oils are designed for all over body massage. Whisper in their ear and find those erogenous zones such as the inner thigh and neck to have them begging for more. Did you know, massage can be more than just foreplay? Try Yoni and Lingam for a unique healing experience which will increase sexual pleasure. The message is simple, the more you touch each other the more you will crave it!
#15 Talk dirty…before, during and AFTER sex
Here is one for your dirty sex bucket list, and it is all about what you say and how you say it. To master the dirty talk, be descriptive and don’t be shy! Ease into it and try not to say anything which may offend your partner. Tell them what you like, and add some fantasy as this is the time to open up about your sexual desires. Set the mood with dirty texts before the deed and keep them hot with dirty talk afterward. There is no doubt your partner wants to know they turn you on, and that you are thinking about all the naughty things you want to do to them.
#16 Put on a show with a striptease
A striptease is a form of foreplay and can be extremely sexy for both the performer and their partner. Men are visual and like to be teased, and this is one of the hottest ways to turn them on. Practice beforehand in front of a mirror and have a glass of wine if you are afraid you might get stage fright. Choose the right outfit, this should be something which is both comfortable to move in while making you look and feel sensual. Pair this with music and move your body to the beat. Confidence is key! There is only one rule, and that is “they can look but can’t touch”…until you say so!!
#17 From kissing to fellatio and cunnilingus, master the tongue
Remember when you were young, and you would kiss for hours? Often couples who have been together for a while don’t take the time to kiss each other. We say, if you don’t use your tongue, you are missing out! Incorporate passionate kissing into sex, and kiss nipples, ears and neck areas to increase their arousal. Go slowly and watch for their reaction, this includes oral sex. Pleasure can be amplified when you go slow with sensual tongue movements down below. There is no doubt that when done with passion and love, kissing, fellatio and cunnilingus will boost intimacy and your romantic connection.
#18 Invite someone into the bedroom
One way to really expand your comfort zone is by inviting another person into your bedroom. This is only for couples who are comfortable with their sexuality and who are open about their deepest fantasies. Discuss this with your partner beforehand to ensure a positive experience for both of you, while creating rules and boundaries. One option is a threesome, this could either be with an extra man or woman. If you would prefer to try something separately before coming back together to discuss your experiences, a swinger’s party could be the right choice. For those with a taste for something more erotic, a public bondage dungeon is something to be enjoyed together.
#19 Watch porn together
Porn can often be seen as a barrier to a partnership, but instead of it being a sneaky solo activity it is something which can be a pleasurable, shared experience. Watching porn together gives you a chance to live out your fantasies, without having to leave the bedroom. This works well as foreplay and will spice things up during those times when you need something more. Making this a shared activity will remove the stigma and may even give you some fresh new ideas of what to try in bed. Porn isn’t something to be afraid of, it doesn’t have to be viewed as cheating, and can get you both in the mood after a long day!
#20 Visit a strip club together
Strip clubs have traditionally been viewed as somewhere to go on a buck’s night, or at the end of a boy’s night out. But, some women are embracing the experience! Visiting a strip club with your partner could be a unique part of your next date night. Watching dancers do their thing will get you in the mood, as it is both naughty and fun. Just like watching porn together, sharing this experience will remove any stigma for the woman and when she has a lap dance, watching it will drive him crazy! Use this as foreplay before going home to create your own fun.
#21 Try phone or video sex
Phone sex has been around forever, and with the advancement of technology, this has evolved to video sex. This is a hot way to maintain the relationship when you are apart, and you can say things you wouldn’t normally be comfortable saying. Listen to your partner to see what is working and tease them as you put on a show. There is something about distance which makes confessing your dirty fantasies easier, and when you do finally meet again the sparks will be electric. Roleplaying can be as simple as putting on a pair of glasses and playing the part of the naughty librarian, and adding creativity will boost the mood for your next video sex session.
The sex bucket list advice in this article is only just the beginning. Work with your partner to choose the items you want to experiment with and add some of your own! All of the items on the list are designed to increase intimacy and put back the passion in your relationship. Whether it is a new move, visual stimulation or sex somewhere risqué, the choice is yours!
Beauty and Lace is an online magazine for women. We hope you enjoyed this article!